Since my wife is vacationing in Europe with family, the whole concept of ‘work/life’ balance has been occupying my thoughts of late.
I often wonder if my work/life scale is in balance or in a state of constant flux. Sometimes I feel like I am back in 9th grade science class, trying to balance one of those metric scales with strange substances on each side (one of which was sure to cause a chemical burn).
How do we ever really know if we are balancing our businesses or careers with the other aspect of life?
When I worked in corporate America, it was widely assumed that anyone who had a ‘work/life’ balance was not serious about their career and they were doomed to the droves of mediocrity. I remember having lunch with about 7 or 8 co-workers one day and the subject came up. Here’s an excerpt from the conversation:
Person A: “Jim? Yeah, Jim has a pretty good work/life balance.”
Person B: “True. But he’s probably not going to get anywhere that way.”
Person C: “Right. He’s just not at that level yet.”
For some people, I doubt that serious thoughts about anything other then work or career advancement enter into their psyche. For others, I think they dedicate as few neurons as possible to work.
I admit to being only a partially painted canvas, specks and blotches of paint slapped on with the beginnings of shapes taking form. I am evolving.
What amazes me is how many people wear the markings of a zero balance life like a badge of honor. Strained relationships, poor health, chronic fatigue, high stress. I have too often worn these markings proudly, only to realize that nobody really thought they were cool.
Work/life balance is not something easily divvied into piles of type A and type B personalities. It goes much further than that. For many, work defines their life. Therefore, the subject of balance is non-existent - there is nothing on the other side of the scale.
Have you ever heard an American make fun of the fact that many European countries take extensive summer holidays? I am not sure if this smacks of only pure jealousy or downright contempt, but it always seems to be said in a tone that implies that ‘Europeans are lazy.’ Lazy? Or perhaps more balanced?
The question of whether work/life balance is myth or reality is most definitely not going to be settled over the course of a blog post.
As I sit and type in the early morning of Memorial Day, I can only ponder further and continually evolve in the direction of my optimal lifestyle. I like the challenge.
Even though late - here are some of my thoughts on your work/ life balance - myth or reality:
I don’t believe I realized what the American lifestyle meant in respect to time off or vacation days.
Having worked mainly in European countries with more or less the same amount of vacation days ( around 30 to 36 days per year; sometimes combined with flex time), it never occurred to me that you could live & work in the US with only 10 to 15 days off - and still call it balanced.
Needless to say I didn’t know how to handle it and went “all out” in my worklife - and barely made it thru my first year - because the vacation “breaks” that I was so accustomed to never came. I do agree - these imbalances are not cool whatsoever - and in fact are detrimental to (at least) my health.
There is something good about powering through a project and then after it is all done to take a few days off to relax and recharge. Never mind taking the time looking at the accomplishment and doing a lessons learned before running head-on into the next project. I miss this tremendously and overall believe it makes you grow faster and learn from your mistakes rather than going non-stop without blinking even once.
Does that make “us” European lazy?
I personally don’t think so. Overall I know that my productivity and enthusiasm for my work goes up - and I am looking forward to going back to work after I had a great time off.
Just working long hours and never taking time off doesn’t make you the perfect employee/ business owner. Usually my rate of errors goes up while my speed and efficiency go down, never mind talking about a certain frustration level or other stress signs. How can you be creative or develop new ideas (in my line of work) when your mind didn’t have time yet to diggest the last 15 projects?
There is a reason why athletes need rest & recovery time as an essential part in their trainings plan - only then can they peak in their performance. I believe the same is true for your life overall - and it makes you anything but lazy doing so.
As for myself: by now I have to admit I have become very Americanized in this category - I am not proud of it and am paying the price. But as you said: it is a continous process and you evolve - maybe I have to “evolve backwards” to make work/ life balance more a reality for myself again.
Finally enough of my 2 cents - have a balanced week!
Wow, thanks for the great comment Barb. I think you are right about working through projects and then decompressing - this is a great technique that allows us to digest what we have done and take lessons from it and improve for the next one.
I have heard some Americans say that the European lifestyle is lazy, (I just think there are lazy people everywhere - not just Europe) but it’s really all about the end result and what lifestyle you want (which makes you define what you hold important in life).
Keep reading for more good stuff to come in this area.
AJD